how we found out

(this is one of the many drafts sitting in my laptop. im keeping my pledge to myself: just keep blogging.)

first, here's a song that reminds me of my baby in my womb. whenever i hear it, i see my baby. and i know s/he will even be more beautiful than my vision. give it a listen as you read. mas masaya. :p 

the journey to having a baby is one part exciting and one part scary. magkakababy kaya kami? are we healthy enough for it? i even googled "how to get pregnant" on our 2-month baby-making mark, and i researched if gail's anti-asthma medicines were hindering us from being successful at it. 

around a week prior to us finding out, jhorace texted me and told me that God prompted her to speak of a vision. "sky is coming," she said. i got super thrilled, knowing that God's promise stands and indeed, our baby sky is coming soon. 

it was also around this time that one of our churchmates told me to sit down and relax while we were talking, because "baka ka makunan." i told her "wala pa pong baby," but she said "meron na yan." so again, my faith was boosted. 

within just three months of trying, i was already struggling. i got frustrated every time people would ask, id ask God and id ask gail. thankfully, God always assures me, and gail always tells me that God knows the best time for baby to come. 

the day before my birthday, i bought a pregnancy test kit. i wasn't so excited about it. i wanted my expectations to be manageable. i just wanted to test because in case it's a positive, maiingatan ko na ang sarili ko agad. at syempre, alam nyo na ang nangyari, positive! i held back tears as i saw the two lines form, i didn't want gail to know yet. i wanted it to be my birthday gift for him. but my self control (and the lack of it) got the better of me. i went what the heck I'm telling him, and tossed the pregnancy kit to his laptop. when he saw it, he said "anong ibig sabihin nito?" smiling. i spoke with my eyes and he hugged me tight. 

the first one to know was my mom, because i wanted to know if i had to do anything. she said to just take care. oo nga naman. and remember she was the one who advised me to just "let the love flow" and not to get pressured about having a baby. love flowed all right. 

we haven't stopped daydreaming ever since. ano kayang mannerisms nya, ano kayang personality ang mabubuo nya, what will be baby's favorite songs and dances? we tirelessly pray for him/her. my personal prayer is that s/he takes everything from his/her dad, except the asthma and the dancing. :p 

sometimes we look at our living room and we feel that it's so empty. good thing somebody's coming along to fill the house with all sorts of joy and fun. we just can't wait. 

ps: sabay bang natapos ang pagbabasa mo at ang music? kung oo, ang galing mo!