some nights

after seeing my name and my words in a blog read by many, i thought to myself, i can do this. i can write. i don't write, write, like a professional fiction writer with words like "behooves" and "plethora", but i know i can get across what's in my mind, and I'm always satisfied with what comes out. 

but here we be, with a blog barely breathing with once-a-month posts. is my life that boring that i haven't written anything in ages? actually, it's been great. I'm pregnant! and stuff! but i just cannot get myself to write in this webspace. 

i enjoy back reading my entries, because they remind me of feelings I've had before, of words i miraculously weaved together. sometimes i cannot imagine being able to use such words to express my mind. i think every person who enjoys writing feels the same way every time they go back to their past works. knucks, works! as if! 

with the response i got from the blog entry i wrote for pastor dennis sy's, I'm challenged all the more to push myself and to just blog. in fact, i have a confession to make: i have a lot of entries in my drafts folder. i just feel like they're unworthy of being published, not like the previous ones i wrote. just like any "artist", i feel a sense of pride in some of the blog entries here, and a lot of cringe in those i do not like. nevertheless, each and every post here is a page of my memory, so why should i stop? 

so I'm not stopping. see ya after two days! :) 

ps: i names the blog entry after a song which, after i listened to it, made me just post this draft that has been sitting for days. give it a listen!